Goodbye My Almost Lover
by Winddrifter
Summary: One shot. Rogue says goodbye to what could have been. Read and Review


_Your fingertips across my skin, The palm trees swaying in the wind. Images_

_You sang me Cajun lullabies, The sweetest sadness in your eyes. Clever trick_

_I never want to see you unhappy. I thought you'd want the same_

_For me_

From her perch on the ledge of her stone balcony she had an unobstructed view of the the tall man tinkering away on his bike in the fading rays of summer sunshine. A soft breeze tousled his unkempt auburn locks, causing them to fall artfully across his forehead. Her hand itched to brush the unruly strands back from his beautiful face. She kept her fingers firmly at her side. Her heart ached for him, wanting nothing more than to fly to his side and have his strong arms wrap around her.

Gambit had made no secret of the fact he wanted to spark a relationship with her from the moment he had arrived at the mansion. For a while she had forgotten herself and allowed him to get closer than anyone else ever had. It wasn't until he snuck a kiss and ended up in a coma for three days that Rogue had finally come to her senses.

_We walked along a crowded street, You took my hand and danced with me. Images_

_And when you left you kissed my lips, You told me you would never ever forget these images._

_I never want to see you unhappy, I thought you'd want the same for me_

He had instantly come to find her when he woke up. She remembered vividly the ways his eyes shone sadly as she told him goodbye. At first he'd kept trying, continuing with the flirtatious banter that she no longer reciprocated, until one day he just stopped seeking her out. They had given each other a wide berth since then. They acted for all intents and purposes like polite strangers.

She'd never been more acutelky aware of his presence, watching him desperatly whenever no one else was looking. Like now. The fading sunlight danced and sparkled off his crimson gaze. Her heart sang out to him as he sat idly on his bike gazing out towards the ocean.

_Goodbye my almost lover, Goodbye my hopeless dream_

_I'm trying not to think about you, Can't you just let me be_

_So long my luckless romance, My back is turned on you_

_Should have known you'd bring me heartache, Almost lovers always do_

His psych had stayed active talking to her constantly in the first days after she told him goodbye. Now although she still felt his presence in her mind he no longer spoke to her the way the others did, giving their opinions at random points in time. Gambit remained oddly silent and kept to himself in the back corners of her mind, watching without comment.

She had tried telling the psych and herself that she just wasn't capable of a normal relationship and there was nothing she could do about that. It wasn't fair to Gambit and it wasn't fair to herself to get her hopes up. The psych just ignored her, though a few others called her a coward.

He revved the engine lazily driving a small test circle about the driveway. His back was to her now and it ripped through her fiercely being unable to see his beloved features. She was distraught, nothing brought her peace anymore. Not her late night flights, not taking long drives on the back roads, not her books. Not anything but seeing his face and that wasn't truly peace but more a double edged sword. She wanted so desperately to see him, be near him, but it only reminded her of what she couldn't have. And just how desperately she wanted it.

_I can not go to the ocean, I can not drive the streets at night_

_I can not wake up in the morning without you on my mind_

Seeing him around the mansion, ignoring her very presence as if she were nothing. As if they had been nothing, it had her crying herself to sleep most nights. She knew she looked awful, with her hair a tangled mess and her eyes rimmed with deep dark circles. He however looked perfect, walking about without a care in the world. Laughing and flirting with the other girls of the mansion. It was as if he didn't even remember her. Was she so easy to forget? Had she really left so little an impression on him, when he had turned her world upside down?

_Now you're gone and I'm haunted, And I bet you are just fine_

_Do I make it that easy to walk right in and out of my life?_

He was driving away from her now, headed down the long drive and off into the warm night air. She forced herself to watch him go and tried desperately to make peace with her decision, pushing away her foolish feelings. She mouthed silently to the retreating figure

"Goodbye my almost lover, Goodbye my hopeless dream

I'm trying not to think about you, Can't you just let me be

So long my luckless romance, My back is turned on you

Should have know you'd bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do"

Jumping down from her perch she forcefully turned her gaze from his silhouette and walk back inside. She had only just turned her back when Gambit skidded to a stop and turned to stare back at the mansion and the balcony of the woman who held him captive. Her curls danced on the soft breeze and he lifted his nose to the air as if the wind could bring the sweet scent of magnolias to him from this distance. If it was what she wanted he'd stay away. He would do anything to make her happy even if it insured his own misery. For her he would gladly pay any price.

_Goodbye my almost lover_

_Should have known you'd bring me heartache_

_Almost lovers always do_

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_The song is Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy._


End file.
